Lunch in Peru

A combi showing a little Che Guevara pride. This is what I ate for lunch today, it was basically beans, meat, potatoes, onions, with rice and a slice of tomato. Amazing flavor despite it’s simplicity. Also the options for lunch at a Menu 2 blocks from my house. 

I'm bartering, of course I'm going to low ball you...

So there I was, standing in a tankie and shades inside of a corner store (of which I am allowed to go into, get with the times El Salvador) with one sol in my left hand and an avocado in my right, so perfect for guacamole that even Vicente Guerrero would declare it worthy of being mashed. “Buenas!” I yell, working to establish my superiority as a tiny old man hobbles out of the back. As soon as he hits the door way he freezes, shoots his gaze down to my right hand and then to my left. We lock eyes but if for a moment and I realize I’m going to have to be smooth if I’m going to get away with this deal. He creeps over to me and grabs the avocado, holding it up to his face as if it were a precious diamond. The señor throws it into the air and catches it as it lands into the palm of his hand. “Un sol cincuenta” I am told. Surely this can be negotiated I think. I palm the sol, knowing that I won’t settle for anything more and smugly I counter with “Ochenta centavos”. He eyes the avocado in his hand trying to visually determine the weight, “Un sol veinte”. I methodically move my sol to my thumb and flick it into the air knowing that the shiny coin will capture his attention and as it lands softly into my palm I thrust it forward and say “Una luca o nada”. He shifts his eyes to the left and right, looking a bit uneasy but finally I hear what I’ve been waiting for since I entered the tienda. “Tenemos un acuerdo, pero no digas a mi esposa”. He snatches the coin, tosses me the avocado and shuffles into the back as I smile and turn to leave with my lush green prize in hand.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you ‘Lomo saltado con chaufa’. It’s one of the most popular/cheapest plates found in a Chifa here in Arequipa, Peru. For S/.5, it’s hard to pass up for a quick bite around lunch time. 

Got bored on my 6:45 am walk to school and thought, why not be a tourist and take some pictures. The taxi is one of the many thousand here in Arequipa that makes getting around quite easy. “Step your game up” was one of the expressions I am currently teaching my advanced class along with “Nailed it”, “Get away with…” and “Cool story bro”. I would say TGIF, but I have a 4 hour class starting at 8 tomorrow, and I thought being a student was exhausting. Beats working in a bank though. Cheers to the weekend and I hope all of you in Cheney have a delicious, watered-down American beer for me tonight. 

I love my classes

Me:What is 'pigging out'?
Student:It's when you eat a lot of food
Me:Spot on. When do we do this?
Student:During Christmas!
Me:Excellent. Another example?
Student:When you're high
Me:Well... I certainly can't argue with that
*This is coming from the same kid who considers strip clubs to be a leisure activity when he's bored

Oh ya know, just some Llamas chillen in a park right across the street from my school. Peru is definitely cooler than the United States. Had an 18 year old girl in class tell me that out of a list of 15 different animals including bears/sharks/lions, that the most dangerous animal to humans was a fox. Bad personal experience for $200?

Swagger (noun): ....

Mary is a 13 old Peruvian girl
Mary:Excuse me teacher, what is swagger?
Me:*singing* Turn my swag on! Oh, sorry bout that. Swagger is how someone walks, dresses, talks, or represents themselves. It's like a type of attitude
Mary:What is 'turn my swag on'?
Me:It's a song by Soulja Boy
Mary:Who?
Me:You've got a lot to learn little one

First day of class was thoroughly enjoyable. Only had 1 student in my first class, so we talked about traveling and exchanged music; also had a debate about what exactly classifies Alanis Morissette as ‘good music’. I’m pretty sure I won. 

I know what you’re thinking, and yes, that sandwich has 4 different types of meats including sausage. Protein shakes after a workout are overrated. I thought the painting on the wall was pretty cool along with the street sweeper whose back is featured in the picture. 

Graffiti next to Plaza Vea in Arequipa, Peru. Almost looks as if the stop sign is painted on the wall, maybe it is?

Shoutout to my buddy Marc ‘Sandy’ Sandoval, hope you like what old people consider 'vandalism’. If I see anymore of this 'trash’ done by 'hoodlums’ I’ll snag a pic and get it up on the 'ol 'world wide web’. 

Helluva sunset last night. That’s the view from my window, along with my courtyard which is (clearly) right below me.

I’m going to cruise Arequipa today looking for a suitable house pet. I’m leaning towards a turtle, but I’d certainly be ok with a lizard or parrot. Open to possible names so let me know!

First day of classes tomorrow, which means I’ll be busy today writing down as many ice breakers and get-to-know-you games as I can. I think I’ll also make brownies to really cut that first day of class tension, or should I make cupcakes? This will be the most difficult decision I’ll make today. Here’s to you Arequipa ‘Cheers’

Had potato, yuca, rice, and beef soup today called ‘Caldo blanco’ followed by 'Matasquita’ which was delicious and as usual, cheap. If you ever go to Peru and don’t try a Menu, then you’ll forever remain an ignorant tourist. Oh I’m sorry Americans, a Menu is a super cheap ($2) restaurant where you get soup, a choice between 3 entrees, and a giant pitcher of juice. I choose which Menu to eat at based upon which has more locals packed into it. Which is also a good rule to follow in general, when in doubt, do as the locals do. 

Moved into my new place today and planning on cooking a feast for dinner. Nothing like trashing the kitchen after you spend all afternoon cleaning it. And as much as I’d like to make sure the patch job on the roof works, I could do without the rain. 

Listen Peru,

I’m not sure what the ‘norm’ here is, but when I order a hamburger, I would most certainly like a bun as well. Delicious patty though

Graphic Designer from El Salvador

This is my buddy Luis from the great country of El Salvador and he has some really great work. I encourage everyone to check out his site if you are at all interested in graphic design

Woke up at 5:30 this morning for absolutely no reason, or it could have been because of the rooster(s), and finally got a glimpse at Misti, the volcano here In Arequipa. By 10, the sun is shining and not a cloud in the sky. It’s a trip; right now it feels like summer, but as we approach June/July, it’s only going to get colder. And by cold I mean not 75-80 degrees on a daily basis. 

I’ve never seen so many shoes in one place in my entire life. The aisle goes for about a city block, but of course no one has a size 12. Received both of the books for my classes in March; so now begins the ‘fun’ process of dissecting the lessons and creating a month worth of lesson plans.

Looked into taking Portuguese classes but they charge more than I make in 2 hours of teaching English. I’ll just have to keep my eyes peeled for a Brasilian chica for some 'private lessons’. 

The last picture was taken in the Plaza and they are all taxis. Getting around has never been easier. 

So there I was in a Peruvian taxi...

Cabbie:Hey you workout here in Peru?
Me:Yeah
Cabbie:Me too! You know where I could get some steroids?
Me:Uh, not exactly. What do you want steroids for?
Cabbie:So I can be big like Arnold Schwarzenegger
Me:Ambitious. And on that note, if you could just stop right here that'd be great...

This is the Plaza de Armas in the center of Arequipa, which is much bigger than these photos display. Took a tourist stroll this afternoon and bought post cards / souvenirs, so if you’re in the states and wondering where your present is, I’m getting ready to make a post office trip in a couple weeks. 

Oh and the elephant was one of many paintings in a restaurant called Mamut that serves sandwiches. I could barely contain myself, I have missed sandwiches so much. Lunch this afternoon was, to say the least, perfect. Despite all the sun in Peru these days, I just seem to keep burning. Maybe after a couple months my body will quit fighting the sun and consent to tan, high hopes…

This piece is outside my gym.

 I’ve been looking at motorcycles lately and after a couple months of work, the only difficult part will be picking which color. A lot of Peruvians tell me that I won’t need a driver’s license and that if I get pulled over, a couple Soles should take care of any ‘problems’ I might have. For my last day of student teaching I am going to teach typical American jokes such as blonde, lawyer, lightbulb etc and why we laugh.

If you are living in the states and that job at the bank isn’t fulfilling that inner urge to live life, I encourage you to travel and teach english. I don’t believe in 10 day vacations, if you’re going to travel, go balls deep and be a part of something greater than yourself. 

Been jamming to this song all day as the sun shines bright here in Arequipa. As you read this you’re looking at a certified ESL teacher who will start teaching March 5th. Today is my last day of student teaching and I will be on vacation until the 5th, which means I’ll probably be keeping things low key, reading books, doing puzzles etc…

Boxing is going quite well and the 60 year old gym owner said that there are local ‘regulated’ fights in Peru if I was interested. Maybe in a month or so old man, nothing like the only gringo fighter getting the shit beat out of him in a foreign country. For all my friends in the states, I hope the sun is shining and you get an early start on that summer tan. 

Shout-out to my buddy Andrew and the biggest ‘bag’ of popcorn I have ever seen in my entire life. Double date Peruvian style was a nice way to prepare for my grammar test in the morning. (Ellen if you are reading this I am studying REAL hard right now) My life here in Peru is exactly what I yearned for while in that desolate college town of Cheney, WA less than 3 months ago. Mañana marks the end of my TEFL course and the start of a thrilling, albeit challenging, but overall fulfilling career path as an educator. For all you Catholics, #80%ofperu, happy Ash Wednesday.